How To Say Goodbye

Sam has always been good at saying hello. He's one of the friendliest people I've ever come across in my life. I fondly remember going to church in my childhood and seeing cheerful Sam, at that point in his teens, greeting people at the front door. His smile and laugh always made you feel as though things were okay in life. 

Over the years, I've had less and less contact with Sam as our lives went in different directions but I've always appreciated and remembered that positive spirit of his. Little did I, or anyone else, imagine that his upbeat attitude would be tested last year in ways beyond belief. Early in the 2019, his youngest sister was diagnosed with cancer. A young wife and mom, she began her treatment immediately and was responding favorably. Sam and his family, as well as his parents and middle sister, all were doing their best to help the youngest sister pull through. A couple months into her treatment and recovery, the worst possible situation hit: Sam was diagnosed with cancer, too. Unlike his sister's case, however, his cancer hit fast and furious, forcing Sam to immediately seek medical help outside of Alaska as his case was far more advanced and complicated than could be dealt with here in state. 

As Sam was about to head to Mayo Clinic for further tests and treatment options, I asked a mutual friend how Sam was doing. "His same positive self as always," they said. Of course, Sam would plow ahead into this new challenge just as he had always faced life up to that point. He would say "hello" to cancer and meet it with a smile. His wife and four adopted sons from Romania hopped on a plane  with him, and they all prayed that God would provide medical answers at Mayo. Instead, after a few weeks of treatment there, it appeared that God's answer would be to take Sam home to be with him. At only 37 years old, the news was devastating. He was given a limited time to live. 

Sam has always been good at saying hello. But it turns out he's also good at saying goodbye. In his usual Sam fashion, he's chosen to go out celebrating. He took his young family on one final vacation a couple months ago to make some memories and then decided to throw a goodbye party on New Year's Day and invite as many friends as could make it over to his house to show his appreciation one last time for all of them being in his life. 

While I'm not surprised that Sam is approaching his death this way, I am aware of how rare it is that someone would go out with such joy. That they would so honestly face their mortality and choose joy all the way to the very end. And it's made me think about how we say goodbye. 

What if you so lived your life that you had no regrets when the time came to say goodbye? What if you so embraced your one chance on this earth that you could go out smiling and not wish for more time? 

I'm not a stranger to goodbyes. I've said many of them in recent years, each one difficult in their own way. Some came suddenly with no real chance to say an official farewell. Others allowed for more time to let go. But Sam's attitude is a reminder to us all that, if you've lived your one life well, there is no need to fear the end. It may arrive sooner than expected, but you can go out smiling. You can head for Heaven in peace because you know how you made the most of your time on earth. You can say goodbye...and be okay with it. 

Sam is down to his final days and weeks now. It won't be long before he's in the presence of his Savior, leaving his wife and boys to start a new life without him. But the celebration is going to the very last minute. Sam's making sure of that. Because life was always good to Sam, and Sam was always good to life. 

It's short...this one life we have. Our time isn't long here. Sometimes it ends up being shorter than we anticipate. So let your life say "hello" and your goodbye will likely be a good one, too.