Making Sense of the Senseless

 The headlines have been imprinted on our minds in recent weeks...senseless acts of cold-hearted violence that have ripped apart families, communities, and countless lives. Acts that have shocked our country and made us sit back with aching hearts and wonder, how could this have happened? Why did we get this way? More importantly, where was God? 

 From Las Vegas to New York and now to San Antonio, the horrifying events have left us reeling and looking for answers. Answers only to be found in the heart of God. 

 When I was younger, I used to ask "why" a lot - why do people behave as they do? why does a loving God allow such horrible things to happen? where is God in our worst moments? I had a faith that could only take me so far when it came to explaining suffering. I know I'm not alone in such questioning. Particularly at a time such as this when our nation is gripped by mourning for these recent tragedies. How does one make sense of the senseless? 

 My perspective began to change a few years back when two things happened in my life that changed how I look at life's worst moments: 1) when I had to suffer myself, and 2) when I was introduced to the truth of God's sovereignty and providential Hand. 

 When one has suffered themselves, they are not so quick to question "why" because they begin to realize that adversity happens to all of us. It is a by-product of living in a sinful, fallen world - nobody escapes its reality. Even though we may attempt to avoid it, run from it, hide from it...it always manages to find us. And yet, in a startling conclusion, we also discover that it has the potential to make us better. It changes who we are and how we view ourselves and what we believe. What we learn from suffering causes us to see life's worst moments as opportunities - however painful - to grow and transform into the person we're meant to become. 

 When we also realize that a sovereign and just God still rules even in the worst of times, it somehow lessens the pain of the blows life gives us. God is not the cause of all things wrong, unjust, hard, sad, or hurtful but He allows these realities to occur in our broken world so that we may see truth for what it is. That we may know what really matters, what really lasts. That we may hope for what we do not see when everything around us tells us to despair. Understanding that God orchestrates events and situations for the sole purpose of bringing broken hearts to Himself and glorifying His name, allows the hurting soul to take refuge in a truth that transcends this dying world. While God has left much of His beauty in this earth, even that is fractured by the sin-sick identity we bear from our first parents so long ago in Adam and Eve. When you see so much wrong in our world, think of this: how much worse would this world be without a redemption-plan in existence through the Lord Jesus?! Sometimes we get so focused on trying to find answers to our problems that we forget the One who sits on His throne, guiding all things for the fulfillment of His will. We ask God if He cares, if He's still out there. Truth is, God never abandoned us - it was us who abandoned God. And God's been chasing our hearts ever since, sometimes using even the painful stories of our lives to call us back to what is sure, lasting, and true. Wooing us back into His grace and His forgiving love. 

 Knowing these things hasn't fixed everything for me. I still fear greatly when my comfortable life gets shattered by the unpredictable. I still mourn for the sad things that happen to either myself or to others. I still feel all the emotions that being a human being includes. But even when my head has yet to agree with God's plan, my heart is allowed, by faith, to bend the knee and surrender to Him, whose plan always and forever trumps mine. The way you make sense of the senseless is to make God your refuge. To attempt to see things as He does. To believe even when His ways don't seem to be readily understandable. It all comes down to trust. Do you continue to trust in the unchangeable goodness of God when all around you things are falling apart? Do you dare to keep opening your two yielded hands in faith when your soul tells you to fear the worst? Do you leave everything in His capable control when nothing around you adds up? 

 Most of the journey to grace is about resting in the unseen. Much of what goes on in this crazy world will not be explained in full until we are all judged in eternity for our actions. But there are glimpses of hope even in the darkest hours. God never leaves or forsakes us. God has never stopped being in charge. He's still there and always will be. He's still moving even when we can't see it. Sometimes you simply have to leave it with Him and walk away in faith. And look for the little evidences of His love in which He shows up in the tragedy and reminds us that redemption is His work. That, in time, even the worst things shall be made beautiful.