When Anger Gets In The Way...

 Rosslyn Chapel is considered to be one of the most beautiful examples of medieval religious architecture. Located in Scotland, it has become a place of tourism, spiritual quest, and pilgrimage since becoming famous when Dan Brown's book The Da Vinci Code brought to public interest, further cemented by a film of the same name a few years later. While many other articles and information exist that tell the history of this famous religious location, locals tell a story about it that, I believe, carries profound meaning for us in light of our own spiritual and emotional healing...         

The tale goes that when the chapel was under construction in the 15th century and stone masons were all working on the inner carvings, a young apprentice completed this one particular pillar with breath-taking beauty. Upon seeing the handiwork, the master carver was so filled with jealousy that he, shockingly, struck and killed the young apprentice. The stone pillar has henceforth been known as the Apprentice Pillar. 

This story resonated deeply within me when I read it, and the lesson was not lost on me: there can be moments when another's gift or spiritual experience or life opportunity exceeds that of our own and we are faced with a choice as to how we are going to respond. As each of us lives out our personal story, we come across times when our ego takes a hit because someone else has out-shined our own abilities or ambition. We take it personally and allow it to drive us to baser acts of violence and anger and blame and shame instead of inspiring us to greater heights of beauty ourselves. We attack and go after the very instruments God is using to change the world... all because we cannot handle the success of another. 

Sometimes the roles are reversed and we end up being the one who is massacred. It hurts when this happens, doesn't it? We're just trying to do our part in the collective whole, leaving something of value and goodness behind, when somebody takes offense at how well we are doing and how we are choosing to live and who we are as a person and suddenly, we feel exposed, violated, betrayed, punished, shamed, blamed, and destroyed as there un-transformed pain suddenly gets unwittingly transmitted onto us. We become the unnecessary target of their own insecurities, fears, trauma, and loss and the beauty we were attempting to create gets lost in the heat of the other person's behavior. 

I find it even more interesting that this supposed incident took place in a church. Without opening up a can of worms too much, I do think it's worth noting that so many experience this kind of judgment and hurt within the walls of a house of worship. The un-healed places of so many who gather there are laid bare as innocent members of the family of faith are taken down and beat up over things that are unnecessary and just plain mean. The zealots and the pharisees among us who have yet to learn the rhythms of Grace would rather go after an innocent who is unintentionally threatening their spirituality than look themselves in the mirror and ask for God to have mercy on their own imperfections. There are too many situations where the apprentice-type is destroyed by a supposed "master carver" who cannot handle the diversity of gifts God bestows. 

When anger gets in the way, it is ugly. You know this. I do also. But it's true. Many beautiful things and beautiful people have been destroyed because someone's shadow self was allowed to control their behavior and their own need for affirmation, success, and moral superiority was greater than than their ability to see the value of another. In any circumstance, it's always easier to build an identity around your wounds, fears, and inadequacies than it is to learn the way of Jesus that leads to grace, forgiveness, and the value of every life. 

True or not, let the lesson of the Apprentice Pillar at Rosslyn Chapel serve as a reminder of what happens when we let passion drive our sense of self instead of the image of God, and may God forgive us for the ones we have slaughtered in our midst because we could not set aside our own pride and appreciate what was in front of us.